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Posted on 31st Aug at 2:29 PM, with 358 notes

cracked:

Click play for hilarious flaming beefs (to help ease the pain)!

7 Horrors of Ferguson Policing (Made Less Awful With Farts)

#7. The Police Never Filed an Incident Report for the Shooting of Michael Brown

After many days of putting off the report’s release, the Ferguson police have since admitted to never even filing one. Incident reports are incredibly important (and required), and they should ideally be written within 24 hours of the incident (for hopefully obvious reasons). But they didn’t even write one. Isn’t that fucking coo-coo bananas, y’all? I guess they either just never got around to it or never got around to wanting to tell the truth about it. Either way, there’s that.

Or there that is not, I guess.

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Posted on 31st Aug at 2:21 PM, with 10,273 notes
cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE
This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.
The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

“Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.
Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was
followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.
ALSO also?

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.
And yet…

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.
View high resolution

cracked:

sorenbowie:

codyjohnston:

shinji-kun69:

Don’t ever fucking try to tell me that white people aren’t targeted and discriminated against for the color of their skin. Don’t ever try to fucking say that ANYONE has never been discriminated against. If you want fucking justice, then ACT on that justice.

HI UM NOPE

This headline is the deformed offspring of lies, bad reporting, and a Getty Image from 2012 taken after a man was beaten by police at the Occupy Wall Street protests.

The article cites no sources and reads like a Facebook Aunt telling a story they heard from their son’s buddy Taylor, most likely because it’s a poorly-paraphrased version of this also false article that calls itself ”White Man Cold-Cocked By Vicious Ferguson Mob In Blatant Racist Attack.” Money quote from the article:

Most recently, a man was simply standing outside of a St. Louis McDonald’s where he was surrounded by a group of black man who punched the man in the face for no reason whatsoever. Seemingly unprovoked, the group intentionally targeted this man for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown.”

Ah, yes, the classic “for no reason whatsoever” immediately followed by “for nothing more than his skin color in a backwards attempt at justice for Mike Brown” trick. That old reporting chestnut.

Anyway. The tale of an entire mob attacking this man was

followed up by showing these tweets, where the story originated:

image

This is all from the same article, mind you. There’s a paragraph describing a mob of black men attacking this white guy, and then they show the actual source describing a single black man punching the guy in the face once. Also? The Knockout Game doesn’t exist.

ALSO also?

image

So really, “Black Man Punches White Man In Face, Other Black Men Try To Apprehend Black Man Who Punched White Man In Face,” because Ferguson’s hero-to-asshole ratio is actually through the fucking roof.

And yet…

image

Anyway. It sucks that the guy got punched a couple weeks ago, but if you’re going to lie about it, try being just so much better at lying.

Cracked shouldn’t be the “journalists” catching this kind of thing. If you read something that sounds outrageous but tickles that part of your brain that wants it to be true, there’s a good chance it’s made up specifically to do that tickling. Take twenty minutes to research it before sharing or you sound like an idiot.

We can de-bullshit you on this kind of stuff but honestly it’s getting exhausting.

Posted on 31st Aug at 2:16 PM, with 70 notes

emkaymlp:

samsynthis replied to your photo

"enough horsing around, we need to get back to business!!"

Posted on 31st Aug at 2:07 PM, with 485,239 notes

the-ink-pad:

hwills456:

luvellah:

von—gelmini:

clannyphantom:

ponywindything:

thatradicalnotion:

Lisa Simpson at Stuff-n-Hug

This really says a LOT

simpsons is so next level

I took my girls shopping for some summer clothes Saturday. T-shirts, jeans, shorts. They both love Marvel and superheroes and transformers and Hogwarts and stuff like that. Not so much pink and pretty stuff. They’ve both grown so much that this was the first time we were shopping in the grown up women’s section. Boring selections when it comes to t-shirts. Flowers and zebras and butterflies.

But what was making it near impossible was that all the t-shirts, the few they kinda-sorta liked, had either low/wide cut necklines or were extremely tailored for nipped in waists with little cap sleeves and short hemlines. Showing way too much skin for their ages as far as we all were concerned. So we headed over to the men’s section. A whole WALL full of properly cut tees with great designs on them!

They ran over and started hunting up things they liked. Two women were stocking shelves. 

"You know these are MEN’S shirts."

"The girl’s section is over there."

"There’s not gonna be any Princesses over here, darlin’."

"These shirts are for the boys."

"This isn’t going to fit you right, honey."

I ignored the first time one of them said anything. Just told the girls what sizes they needed to look for and that they could each pick five shirts. But the women kept interrupting me. I tried to stay polite. “Yes, I know this is the men’s department.” But they kept making comments.

Finally I was getting mad. I told them we didn’t need any help. My girls were allowed to wear whatever they liked and they didn’t like the shirt designs in the women’s section and I didn’t like how low the necklines were.

Instead of just noticing that I was getting fed up with their “help”, they started arguing with me! One of them told my oldest, who is conventionally cute and skinny and starting to fill out (but still only 12), that “Oh that’s just because he’s your daddy. He doesn’t understand that a girl wants to show off for the boys!”

That was the last straw. I’m afraid I totally lost my temper. I told them (amongst a few other choice words) that they’d better walk away and come back to finish restocking the shelves once we’d left the area or I’d get the manager.

I try hard not to be rude to sales people and people in the service industry. That’s a difficult and thankless job. But for fuck’s sake! The first few comments were bad enough, but trying to undermine my moral authority with my kids? All in the name of  gender and sexuality policing. They couldn’t get past the idea that my girls might prefer t-shirts that had “boy” designs on them and that didn’t hyper-sexualize them. The idea was abhorrent to them and they had to interfere and then KEEP interfering.

Once our sales “help” was gone, the girls found a bunch of shirts. Captain America, Minecraft, Doctor Who, Batman, Avengers. All the stuff they’re into. I mean, they also like MLP and Littlest Pet Shop and soft fluffy stuffed animals and Monster High dolls. We hit the toy section too for some of that stuff cos they brought their saved-up allowances with them. 

At least we didn’t get any “help” in the shoe section. They’d’ve had a cow again cos while the youngest found a cute pair of pink and purple sneakers, I ‘let’ the oldest go to the men’s section and find a cool pair of dark blue and grey ones. (and omg their feet are huge! youngest wears a women’s size 9.5 and oldest wars a men’s 8. FFS, I wear a men’s 8.5. Their feet are almost as big as mine! How’d that happen?)

I hate this gender policing shit and won’t put up with it at all. I always feel for kids whose parents enforce this shit. I see it at stores when a girl or boy strays outside the lines, too often the parents are the one who pull them back into their place and it makes me sad.

Like, their friends who are boys, when they’re over at our house, they sit there and play with the girl toys as much as the boy toys. One of the boys loves playing LPS with my youngest, making up stories and stuff. The first time I walked out into the playroom and saw, he got so nervous and tried to say that he was just doing it to be nice to her. I told him that it was fine. He could play with whatever he wanted to and I wouldn’t tell anyone. Word got around to the other boys I guess cos now they all play whatever and don’t stop if I “catch” them.

I get shit from my mom about it too. I’m trying to make them into little boys. I shouldn’t have bought them trucks and toy swords when they were little. The oldest needs to learn to start wearing dresses now not just blue jeans. Why did I ‘let’ her get her hair cut short? I need to put the youngest on a diet and make her wear training bras. Why do I let them play with boys? etc etc etc. 

*eyeroll.gif*

I just find it so hard to believe that it’s the 21st century and people are still getting their knickers in a twist over this kind of thing.

^^^^ This man deserves a dad of the year award. ^^^^

This is what I love to hear, we finally are getting to the generation that is more open minded and willing to let kids do and wear what they want. This man is amazing, not only did he not force his girls, let them express themselves, but he let’s the boys play with what they want, even if it’s ‘girly’ toys.

I almost want to say this story is fake, simply cause it’s too perfect to believe, but I am jaded, cynical, and untrusting of things without proof. But I know there are people out there like this dad, so real or jsut a story, I intend to believe it regardless cause I like to think if I was ever a dad, I’d try to be much more like this dad.

Posted on 31st Aug at 4:40 AM, with 1,523 notes
commanderabutt:

mankvill:

just a reminder you’re all being played like a god damn fiddle

honestly “screen cap taken 12 seconds after last tweet” is kinda where I draw the line
View high resolution

commanderabutt:

mankvill:

just a reminder you’re all being played like a god damn fiddle

honestly “screen cap taken 12 seconds after last tweet” is kinda where I draw the line

Posted on 31st Aug at 4:26 AM, with 3,172 notes

magical-pig:

mypettentaclemonster:

nericurls:

rinlockhart:

frostbackcat:

Furries are so embarrassingly predictable.

Oh look, my friend grinder’s pic’s in this one

FINISH YOUR PIC DAMMIT

It’s called rule 34.

When will people understand that from all the “rules of the internet” there’s one that is true. Rule 34: There’s porn of it.

ANGRY GRAH ANGRY

Posted on 31st Aug at 4:13 AM, with 19 notes

shittywebcomics:

Anita Sarkeesian Debunked in Under a Minute

Start
00:00 AM